Taking Steps Toward Leadership–an ordinary life

A mediocre life.  An ordinary life.  What’s the difference?  An ordinary life is one where you do the best you can and you enjoy your journey.  A mediocre life is one where you do just the minimum, you don’t enjoy your journey, you just spend your time on this earth until you run out of time.

Look at what she’s saying here.  She doesn’t want to be a helicopter parent.  She doesn’t want her house displayed in Better Homes or Good Housekeeping.  She doesn’t want to look like Jeri Ryan or Demi Moore.  She want’s to be ordinary, mediocre.

Let’s examine the bell curve in statistics.  It measures data points.  You can’t see the people behind the dots.  You can’t see how their lives impact those around them.  We are led to believe that standards for looks and behavior are set by an authority outside of ourselves.  “This is how much you SHOULD weigh.  This is how much time you SHOULD spend on your children.  You MUST engage in these activities.  These requirements are what normal people do, and you’re not normal.”  I think I have railed against this before.  There is one man in Kansas named Bob that is normal and I think the normal woman is somewhere in central North Dakota.  They’re not married to each other so they’re already down in the lower part of the normal curve.

We’ve been told that if we don’t make a big impact on the world, we’ve failed.  Look at Albert Einstein.  Now look at his parents.  What type of monumental impact did they have on the world?  How do you measure their impact?  Then speculate at what their influence did to Albert.  We know nothing of Albert’s home life…his conversations with his parents, his practice on the violin, his Parent/Teacher conferences.  You don’t have to be famous to have significance.  You can “be someone” without an audience of thousands.

My husband loves the starfish on the beach story.  You know, the little boy that was picking up star fish and throwing them back into the sea.  The man says, “Why bother?  You can’t really make a difference.”  Then the little kid picks one up and says, as he’s throwing it, “Made a difference to that one.”

I’ve been watching this TV series called “Person of Interest.”  The all-knowing machine divides people into Relevant and Irrelevant lists.  It tracks their personal and professional lives and if the person in question goes down a path that might lead to a terrorist act of violence, he’s listed as Relevant, and his name is given to the Government which takes (sometimes extreme) measures to neutralize the threat.  If the person in question goes down the path of getting revenge on a cheating spouse, he’s listed as Irrelevant.  The machine gives the Irrelevant numbers to our heroes, and they go about saving the victims or arresting the criminals so as to avoid the violence the machine has projected.  The interesting thing about this is that in the act of saving innocent victims and locking away the criminals it changes a timeline.  The tweaks the machine creates has a ripple effect.  Later in the series, some of the Irrelevants come to the rescue of our heroes.  These people that were irrelevant now have a significant impact on their society.  It makes them now members of the Relevant threats to the enemy.  These rescued people go on about their ordinary lives, but with a realization that they’ve been spared from murder.  It changes their perspectives.  Because of interference, they now have businesses and lives and children they never would have had before.

I propose this:  There are no unimportant lives, no mediocre people, no ordinary people.  It is not an individual that makes a culture, it is a large mass of average people with the same optimism in life.  When we live a simple, uncomplicated life and we impress that view on the people we surround ourselves with–friends, family, coworkers, clients–we do make an impact.  That’s a big WE.  It was that WE that started the American Revolution.  We cannot be bullied by what the experts say we should think, and do and be.  Simplify, reduce, and move together.  When you lead, lead by example.  When you inspire, inspire by telling someone else’s story and don’t brag.  When you pray, pray by yourself of course, but pray with your church too.  Lead to help people, don’t lead because of a paycheck or for power.  Don’t misuse your station.  Be the best You you can be and don’t measure against anything but your own standards.  Then the people you lead can be the best persons they can be.

What she describes in her article is not a mediocre life.  It is an ordinary life, a designed life.  It is one that meets or exceeds the needs of those she cares about.  It is one based on love, not position, not power.  Love will influence more than any other trait.  Her so-called mediocre life is a significant life, and that’s what we all strive to be isn’t it?